This is not the first time that these feelings have cropped up in his heart. He went through a similar emotional turmoil same time last year. These months of May have been bringing along with them a sense of desolation which have fostered from the disappointments he has had to suffer. Coupled with these disappointments, a feeling of worthlessness has made matters worse for him.
Nonetheless, come July he knows that he will be expected to pick himself up and start again with his life. Last year, he still had hope in his heart. But the unexpected rejection that he has had to bear this year has devoid him of any hope. All the talk of keeping a positive frame of mind seems a farce to him. Even being counselled by his well-wishers has not had the desired effect on his psyche. He knows in his heart that something far greater than condolences is needed this time to help him stand up and face the music again. What it would be he does not know. Last year he needed a trip to a distant majestic land to get back on his feet. Even a trip to faraway land might not help him this time around.
He fears July. He is scared of going back to the place where it had all begun. Last year it was his friends who had persuaded him to give it one more try. This year even their words of encouragement seem shallow. “Shit happens”, they said. “Why always me?” he asked. They did not have an answer to this question of his. Even they understood that they were speaking to a troubled soul by the tremble in his voice. Sensing this, even their resolve began to crumble. Even they felt sad that one of the chirpiest and funniest guys has had to face such misery two year in a row.
Given his troubled childhood, this was expected. He has always had a tendency to be either overly happy or overly sad. He has been seen completely devastated at the occurrence of the tiniest of mishap. At the same time, he is overjoyed at even the hint of an impending joyous occasion. This inclination of his has been a source of major headaches for his well-wishers.
This is the story of a boy who might not grow up ever. A boy whom you might know. A boy who wants the world to know him as a great guy with a troubled past. A boy who has given his all to try and lead a normal life. A boy who wants to be remembered fondly but is unable to keep a lid on his emotions. This is the story of the enigmatic Italian footballer Mario Balotelli!
Suvansh Bansal, a PGP1 student at IIM-A, wrote it when I was really frustrated and realised that I was not alone.